Why is this the Ghetto?

Well I suppose technically it's not. We live in a very inner-city neighborhood. The kind of neighborhood who either everyone knows about because they "used" to live here or never heard of because they don't drive this far into the city. We hear ambulances and fire trucks screeching by about 5 times a week. Fourth of July and New Year's Eve are very festive around here. When a certain NBA team wins the National Championship (again) it's also very festive. The car honking and yelling last past midnight and people just walk around right in the middle of the street. Guys wearing white wife beaters with baggy khaki pants walk around the park with their pit bulls. There are car accidents at the corner all the time because for some reason that pesky telephone pole is just in the wrong place. When you hear the tires squeal and the crash you go outside to see if everyone is ok. But when you hear CRACK, CRACK, CRACK and then the tires squeal you don't go outside. We have our choice of several bus routes all within easy walking distance. The "bad side of town" YMCA is only two miles from our house. The only year we signed our daughter up for soccer there, a fight broke out on the next field over. Yup, apparently 3 year olds playing soccer inspired the fight. Trash blows around in our yard all the time. Occasionally it's because the dog knocked over the trash can but usually it's just the usual trash that's blowing around. Once when we were picking up the trash we found a driver's license and some other cards belonging to a lady whose purse had been stolen. Apparently the thief ditched the unwanted cards in our bush as they were driving by. She was glad to get those cards back.
BUT, our neighborhood is a Conservation District just a few blocks down from a Historic District (where the house price easily jumps up 100,000 or more). This was a ritzy neighborhood 50 years ago and there are rumors it is going to see a renaissance. There are lovely tree-lined streets because the trees have had time to grow. Every house looks different (no box houses as we like to call them). Except for some duplexes behind us only one family has moved into the neighborhood since we did 6 years ago. There are houses for sale but none are sitting empty. We know our neighbors. Once when our dog got in a fight with the neighbor dog a neighbor from across the street came over to help us. During a hot summer drought we spotted a grass fire across the street and my husband ran over and quickly stomped it out. There are young couples, elderly people, families with kids, retired folks. A bat colony has a home around here somewhere. An old fat skunk has been smart enough to find a good home (and plenty of food) for himself without being much of a pest. We have a pair of cardinals that make our backyard home and someone even has a rooster although I haven't figured out which house it is yet (I've got it narrowed down to four). When we were buying our house we had a few people tell us we were making a mistake. "You're going to buy a house there?" But we have been here 6 years now and overall we like it. So what do you think? Is this the ghetto? Well.....

mmmm soap!

OK, so I made toothsoap. Yes that's right I said soap. If you are brave enough to try it here is the recipe. I have found it to taste a wee bit soapy - but really it is not that bad. Perhaps the recipe needs some tweaking.

5 TBSP coconut oil (solid below 76F, so ours is always liquid)
1 TBSP Dr Bronner's castile soap (I used peppermint but you can also use baby which has no scent)
Orange essential oil
Peppermint esential oil (if you didn't use peppermint soap)
Water (1 TBSP or more as needed)
Natural sugar substitute (I used purevia)

Mix all the ingredients together. Add in a little water at a time until it is the right consistency for toothpaste. It will be a little runny. I did not need to use the water since in our house the coconut oil is liquid (we keep our thermostat set at 80 in the summer). But I may have to add some in the winter. I used about 25 drops of the orange essential oil. Add in the sugar sub until it tastes ok. I ended up using 4 individual sticks of the purevia. Don't taste it too many times in a row or it will burn your mouth. Put it in a clean soap dispenser or a small plastic squirt bottle.
There it is.
Clean your teeth with no fluoride and no sodium lauryl sulfate. Or you could just use baking soda :o)

Watch where you're looking!

A few weeks ago my daughter told me to "watch where you're looking". I chuckled a little because I know she meant to say "watch where you're going" But after I thought about it a little bit I think what she actually said is better advice. Yes, we should all watch where we're looking. When I am looking at my sweet child's face am I thinking about the grocery list, or the dishes in the sink, or the pile of projects that gets bigger and bigger? When I read her a story am I just thinking how quickly I can get done so I can move on to the next chore on my list? I am so guilty of not watching where I'm looking. In these days that I am trying to be productive, get projects done, find ways to save money and check off my whole checklist for the day I don't want to miss the moments flying by. I am trying. Please God, help me to watch where I am looking. Help me to burn the ordinary extraordinary in my memories and see you in everything.

This is a project I did a while back for my mom as a housewarming gift. An old piece of wood became the inspiration for a welcoming sign. I added a hanger to the back and used a wood burning tool (around 10 bucks at Hobby Lobby or Michael's)to burn the design. At first I was annoyed because the wood grain was rough and so the tool didn't always go exactly the way I wanted it to. But after it was done the roughness of it made it look really good. It was easy and fun especially when the wood caught fire and I had to blow it out! Whew! Good times!

Bird Food

So I always think of good things to write about when I am away from the computer. Then when I get in front of the computer it's like I have temporary amnesia. I cannot think of a darn thing to write. But it has been a little while since I wrote and I need to keep up with it. I have been working on some projects and I plan to post them on here. So be patient.
Our grapes this year are bigger and tastier than last year. They are still small by grape standards but we are pleased that they have increased in size. They are also much sweeter. Last year they were just a wee bit tart (insert pucker lips here). We still have to buy our grapes at the store but I am happy to say that the birds have found our grapes and are eating them up! Cheapest bird food ever. Also my son made a really cool bird house at church camp and we found the perfect place to put it up. It is partially hidden by some bushes which are right outside of a bedroom window. Hopefully the birds will feel it's a good place for a home and we will be able to watch them from the window. Our cat is no longer an issue since she decided to get hit by a car and break her leg. She is now a gimpy kitty and we don't let her out. The birds, lizards and snakes in our yard all breathed a sigh of relief. Actually we think the birds were the ones driving the car! Anyway,I plan to make some bird feeders out of old coke bottles and a bird bath out of some terracotta pots. I am going to have to figure out how to have a nice landscape for the birds without giving them a free for all in our garden. That will require some research.......

Preparations

Lately my visions of the future have not been very positive. There are too many wheels being set into motion and very quickly. I hate to be pessimistic but I am not the only one who is thinking that way. I also think it is interesting how so many people are suddenly interested in simple/frugal living, re-fashioning, re-using, gardening and keeping chickens. It is just too much to be a coincidence. It also seems many of them are believers.
My daughter is named after a woman in the Bible who is described as being "beautiful and intelligent". She was also very prepared. When David was coming with an army of 400 men to kill her husband and all his men she whipped out 200 loaves of bread, 2 bottles of wine, 5 sheep that were ready to be cooked, a bushel of grain that had been cooked, 100 raisin cakes, and 200 cakes of pressed figs to give to David. Wow! Now that is really prepared!
So pondering this I have come to the conclusion that I am not being paranoid or fearful or even pessimistic. The holy spirit is prompting us and saying "better get ready". I know a wonderful christian woman who lives in Missouri and has been preparing for a while now. She has been stockpiling food and supplies and is even getting a windmill put up on her land. She says when she finds a good blanket at a garage sale or thrift store she gets it because she thinks someday someone will need a blanket and she will go to her storage and get them a blanket. I am not as prepared as she is. In fact, I feel a little frustrated that it seems our ability to get prepared is hampered. For one thing we live smack dab in the middle of the city. I am not sure how productive we can make our yard and even if we do are we more vulnerable to theft because we are more obvious? My first instinct is to get the heck out of the city and move way out in the country where we are not so "see"able. But maybe God is putting His thumb over us to keep us right here so that we will be the helpers when he calls on us. I am not sure but either way I feel a great stirring in my heart to get prepared. These things are actually fun and interesting to me anyway. I am bent towards using resources wisely and finding new ways to use something. And I love the thrill of finding a real bargain. It has been taught to me from an early age by my mom and Girl Scouting. I like being crafty and I feel very satisfied when I make something new out of something old. I also like being prepared. Enjoyable as it is I still feel a sense of urgency about it. And I sense that others do as well. Lord help us all to have strength and endurance for the times that lie ahead. Give us discernment that we might make good preparations and be ready for the tasks you have planned for us.
(This photo is from the vegetable garden at Epcot. Just one more reason we should move to Disney World!)

Too much squash?

The squash casserole in the pic by the way is delicious. I found the recipe when I had way too many squash to know what to do with. So I searched by ingredient on a recipe site. It has been a hit with everyone who has tasted it. (At least they acted like it anyway). I have tweaked it slightly by leaving out one egg and the butter and eye-balling the rest of the squash. Don't worry about measuring it! Just get a big bag of squash and add in enough peppers, onions, cornbread and cheese until it looks right. And you might want to put half in a dish to freeze for later.
http://easy.betterrecipes.com/moms-squash-casserole.html

Fighting Monsters

What is it about the urge to write at inopportune times? In the car, out of town, at two am? I said at two AM!?!?!?!?!? Well, I did say I wanted to blog.....
My husband found this article and left it up on his computer.
http://www.salon.com/mwt/feature/2009/03/26/bauer_autism/
Yesterday morning I read through it and wept so bitterly I had to lock myself in the bathroom to prevent my children from seeing my painful red and wet face. It wasn't a new fear that filled me but the scab had been scratched off and it was bleeding again. This mother just articulated it so well. She was sharing her own painful story and I was crying because I don't want to be her someday. Now, reading this I make the assumption that she is not a believer due to some references about where she puts her hope. (One place is with Obama and I could really go on about that for a while but that is not the topic of this post.) Anyway, I am not sure if that is accurate or not but I thought her references to hope seemed flimsy at best. But in many ways I have been there (am there?). I know that I have complete access to the creator of the universe through my risen savior. And yet, if I am brutally honest, there are times when hope seems stupid wishful thinking.
All I have to do is whisper? Then why aren't my shouts being heard?
The night before I read this article our son had said to his little sister "I am going to stab you in your pee-pee". It shocked us and disturbed us to say the least.
"Where in the world did you hear something like that?"
"I don't know. I just made it up."
Later he blamed it on public school kids. Yeah right, all the evils of the world are because of public school kids. I think making it up is even worse than hearing it somewhere. He also saw the article on the computer. He sat in my lap and cried and said, "I just want to grow up and have a job and have a family and be happy." Yeah, me too.
We know a family that seems so perfect it just makes you sick to your stomach. She has a beautiful house in the country which her husband built with his own hands. The amazing front door was conveniently left in a dumpster for them to find. She has a small but lovely parcel of land from which a bountiful garden spills forth. Her children romp around in a playhouse, a swing set (the kind so big even the grown-ups can swing real high on it), and a little babbling brook. The adults have an outdoor kitchen and covered patio to sip their lemonade and have their bible study.
Bleh!
A few weeks ago we were at her house. She told a story about how their dog (who is also gorgeous and perfect of course) had been run over by a bobcat when she was six months old. They took her to the vet for x-rays and found out that the dog's hips and entire pelvis had been shattered. They decided not to spend the money on the expensive and likely unsuccessful surgery and took her home. The dog was prayed over during their bible study. And it was miraculously healed. Not right away, but all the broken bones in that shattered dog healed into all the right positions. "Wow! That's amazing!" Everyone said. I felt like screaming, crying, slapping her face and puking all at once.
What about my son? Am I to think that the creator of the universe values a dog more than my son?
There are times when I see things and I just can't comprehend why they are the way they are. I see the struggles my son faces minute by minute. And I know there is greater suffering in the world than his. But still...
I also know a family whose son passed away because of a terrible genetic disorder. He knew a lot of pain towards the end of his short life. I found out about their son's diagnosis just a few weeks after we found out about our son's. I really grieved for him and his family. It was genuine. I did not wish this upon them or think that it was great they had to endure this. But at the same time there was a little voice in the back of my head that said, "But I would rather deal with that than this." GASP! How could you say such a thing? You are ungrateful and crazy!
Maybe.
But like this mother said - Oh if it were as simple as just cancer!
At least with cancer (or any fill-in-the-blank disease you like) you know what you're battling. It is as though we are chasing after an intangible, unpredictable spook. Yes, like she said, a monster. Will we conquer it? Will our love, time, energy, prayers, reading, counseling, therapy, faith and tears be enough? Or will it rear up and devour our son right in front of us? It always comes down to the same question doesn't it? Why?
I do not want to be like her. I do not want to hope in research or therapies or diets or other such quack juice.I do not want to lose hope. But I can relate to her. She articulated the dark fear that lies within. She is living it.
But please God, not my son. Please Lord, I believe. Save me from my disbelief.

STUFFED

Sorry I haven't written. We did some MAJOR house cleaning. And it feels so good! We cleaned out 2 rooms and steamed the carpets. So of course, putting both rooms back together involved a lot of cleaning and reorganizing. We got rid of a lot of stuff. Yeah! Then we had family in town for a graduation from basic training. We ate out 6 times in 5 days (4 meals in 2 days). Oh my, I think we all felt sick. On Monday we were all just laying around like we were spent. I know some of it was the busyness but I also think some of it was the food. Back to real food now. I don't think any of us want to go out to eat for a while. This morning I made banana bread muffins from scratch. Tonight for dinner I made squash casserole from scratch - even the cornbread was from scratch. OK, that was only because I opened the pantry to find that I was out of the cornbread mix and I was too lazy to run to the store. But I found a recipe for the cornbread and I was pleasantly surprised at how easy it was. And Yummy! I don't think I will be buying any more mix. What a nice dinner we had although I have to say steak is nice but not worth burning your house down. OK, I admit that this pic was snapped just moments before flames shot out of the oven. I think I will leave the steak cooking to the men folk because I am much better at cooking chicken! But as they say... all's well that ends well.

Things that tick me off or I feel prickly

Ok, so if I am really honest here there are actually a lot of things that can really get me upset. Sometimes I don't know why I let it bother me so much. But really, I just don't understand why some people can't just be a little more considerate and pay attention to their own actions. Like this morning I was behind a car waiting to turn left. He chucked an almost full can of coke out the window. It spilled and rolled around on the street. I mean please, can you not just hold onto it until you can throw it away the right way? It's such a small thing is it really too much to ask for? I felt like gunning my engines and ramming the back of his car (which had taped on taillights anyway). But that wouldn't be nice. Then later today an ambulance was approaching from the opposite direction and I immediately pulled over to the side of the road. Some jerk behind me just kept on driving as if nothing was happening. It seems to me that if people can't even be nice, considerate and civil to each other in even the smallest of ways then how can we expect big things to matter. Like being a responsible parent. Yesterday I worked and there was a girl who had a baby and she was trying to decide if she should give him up for adoption or not. The father was apparently being a very uncooperative jerk (surprise, surprise). She already had a toddler at home and she couldn't imagine how she was going to do it alone with two of them. But she really loved her baby and didn't want to let go of him. It was so sad. I can really understand her turmoil because I went through a very similar situation. The thought of handing my baby over to another woman and him calling her "mommy" was too much for me. It is certainly an agonizing decision. So if people could just throw their own trash away and pull over to let an ambulance pass would it be any better? Would all the babies have loving responsible parents?

Self Sufficiency

I am not sure how possible that is with a small house and lot in the inner city. But my goal is to become MORE so. Our garden is not that great this year because we have not had the time to work it. But I plan to build some raised beds and go from there. My dad is going to help me build a portable chicken coop. I have been keeping a compost pile and I need to get more worms. Plus I am trying to squeeze every last drop out of our limited resources. That is just good stewardship. These are some pics of our ghetto garden. Our oranges are about the size of lemons. Last year the grapes got to be large pea size and we're hoping they will get bigger this year. The broccoli is growing well (we planted from seed) and the green beans ain't too shabby either. We did get a late start this year and not a lot of time to work it. But progress is what it's all about.

Too many things to learn...

I love to learn. I really do. Right now I have a list of things I want to learn that is so long I know I will never get to do ALL of them. But the good news is that I truly believe there is more for us in heaven. In other words, God will still have tasks and missions and things for us to learn. It is not just going to be floating around in clouds and singing. Although those things will be nice to do too. So here I am trying this blogging thing again. I want to write about all of my interests that I am exploring and the things I am trying to accomplish. The last few months I have hardly worked (outside the home) at all! YEAH! And I am just starting to get the house under control. By that I mean things are cleaner, more organized and the kids and I have a good routine going. I have several projects I am eager to get started on and now that the above are reasonably tamed I feel like I can tackle other things. It is so exciting. So right now my big effort is to live as frugally as possible. I have always been frugal(even before it was cool). I was taught from an early age to value resourcefulness. So I am trying to make the most of our resources. Plus I get a real thrill out of saving money. And now I want to try to use those skills to make some money too. Here I plan to document the progress of my projects, the things I am learning, the things I am reading about and what I dream about. Maybe you will want to read it and maybe not. That is fine because this is really for me. (These are the super ugly cushions that came with the free wooden couches. I am going to sand a refinish the couches and then find some outdoor fabric to recover the cushions.)